“Gnome” from Writing Prompt 2

A gnome, a really ugly one, squat of body, gnarled of face, mean of eye, strolled out from around the carton of milk and jerked the box of cereal away from Shepard. The gnome stuck his filthy mitts into the cereal and shoved the food into his mouth, said mouth containing a long pointed tongue and broken and black teeth of ugly yellow. Shepard took the bottle of Kahlua from which he had been swilling, and emptied the contents down the sink. The gnome kept eating, dribbling milk down his chin. Then gnome stripped naked. Shepard went to the cupboard and took down his entire supply of spirits and upended every bottle into the sink. The gnome climbed into the box of cereal to reach those hard-to-get Fruit-Loops wedged in the corners. Shepard opened his fridge and gazed at the six-packs of Guinness Stout. He looked at the gnome. The gnome was now lying in Shepard’s bowl of milk that had one stray red piece of cereal floating in it. The gnome’s eyes closed, and the small monster splashed milk across his protruding belly and hairy navel. Sheppard decided he was of such stern stuff that he could give all the Guinness to his sister when he went to her and his brother’s-in-law house tonight for dinner. Sheppard looked at the bowl of milk and gnome. Milk suddenly bubbled violently between the gnome’s legs. The gnome was farting it up in the milk, farting up the milk. The lone, red Fruit Loop floated to soggy rest on the gnome’s hairy belly. The gnome bent his head to it, and slurped it up. Shepard grabbed up his six-packs of Guinness and headed out to his car. His sister wouldn’t mind him showing early, especially with all this Guinness.

The next day Shepard awoke happy—one day sober! He showered, dressed, ready for work. He popped into his kitchen for a quick bowl of cereal—a different type than yesterdays. He filled his bowl with cereal, then milk, instead of putting in milk first as was his usual habit. The gnome strolled out from behind the cereal box, strolled up to Shepard’s bowl, set its elbows on the rim of the bowl and then set its head on its hands in contemplation of the bowl of cereal. Shepard lowered his spoon back to the table top. The gnome stripped and climbed into the bowl of cereal and milk. It fixed Shepard with an insolent glare as it squatted down and started smacking on cereal.

Shepard simply left the apartment and went to work. He called a number on Craig’s List about another apartment and drove to it that night, deposit monies in his pocket. He never went back to his old apartment.

“I’m clean now. I don’t want those memories.”

In his old apartment the new tenant, a woman named Hooke, stubbed another cigeratte into her stuffed, stinking ash tray. A really ugly gnome was eating her toast as it sat in the sunny side-up egg she had just cooked for herself.



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Why theaters, like Storycrafter Studio, Open Where They Do

For decades, cities have rezoned blighted areas as arts and cultural zones in order to improve the areas. Artists come in, lured by low, low rents they can afford and set up shop. The Abbey Theater in Dublin was originally a funeral home in a bad part of town that a patron of the arts bought for Yeats and his fellow playwrights (Sean O’Casey, etc.) to open a theater. The Village in NYC moved from bad area to art conclave, and because of the artists eventually became ultra expensive. Lincoln Road on Miami Beach was a terrible area until the artists moved in. As usual, the artists attracted so many people that eventually the artists on Lincoln Road were financially pushed out with rents climbing to $100,000 a month. Wynwood, a dangerous area of empty warehouses that the city feared would catch fire, lured in the artists with cheap rents. Today few artists can afford Wynwood and are seeking inexpensive rents in other parts of Miami. Some of Miami artists can be found in Little Haiti where the Villain theater and art galleries have sprung up on along the tree-lined streets. As most Miamians, know, however, both Wynwood and Little Haiti suffer from very little available parking and gun fire. North Miami has for many years been interested in beautifying and uplifting the city. In the time honored method that has always worked so well, the City of North Miami has zoned an area as a Design and Culture District. Part of the district runs along West Dixie Highway. From NE 125 St, where great music and art can be found at the Museum of Contemporary Art, the Luna Star Café, and various small are galleries, to up along West Dixie Highway to about 130th Street where the Performing Arts Network and Storycrafter Studio do live performances, the arts are moving to North Miami. Like arts Wynwood (prior to becoming corporate Wynwood) and arts Lincoln Road (prior to becoming corporate Lincoln Road), West Dixie Highway has its fine restaurant, Captain Jim’s Seafood Restaurant. Unlike Wynwood and Little Haiti North Miami’s Cultural District has plenty of free public parking and NO gunfire. So come to West Dixie Highway in North Miami and enjoy dinner at Captain Jim’s Seafood Restaurant and see The Wish Maker at Storycrafter Studio. If you do, you will have found where artists have come.

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Actors: Introverted Extroverts; Playwrights Are More So

A few years ago I took a writing workshop to meet people in my neighborhood and because as an author, periodically taking classes helps me keep up my form. My writing workshop instructor talked to us about “blog personas.” Now this was something that really grabbed my fancy because, well, I don’t think I have one. It seems to me that it would be a good thing to have, a Blog Persona. There are some of us whom psychologists call “extroverted introverts” which means shy people hiding behind a façade of extroversion. Many actors are extroverted introverts; they love to be in the limelight but really are quite introspective and retiring. I’m an extroverted introvert. My first reaction to being asked to write or speak is “What should I say?” “What should I say” and having to talk to strangers can be so worrying, so intimidating that at times, often in my inadequately spent days of green girl years that not knowing, the saying did not get said. The pizza did not get ordered—I’d have to talk to a stranger and what should I say? I’m only going to admit to not ordering pizza on the phone. I’ll leave the other things I couldn’t figure out how to say and the people to whom I should have spoken and did not to your merciful (please?) imagination. I suspect a lot of bloggers must be extroverted introverts. Think of it. You don’t really have to face any stranger and you can say what is in your head and assume no one is going to read it—and if anyone does, they aren’t really real. You can’t see all those internet people or hear their voices.

As an extroverted introvert, I have a public face, public voice that rings with “pear shaped tones” per my training in the theater. My private face, my private voice, hmm, there’s a bunch of them. Playwrighting teachers say that’s perfectly normal for playwrights. Psychologists tend to think so long as it doesn’t interfere with getting on with your life, it’s fine. So this thing of finding one’s voice is more like choosing my voice or not letting the aggrieved-with-the-world voice slip in to mess up the fun voice I want to play with. I’m reminded of my lawyer, an amiable, tenor-voiced person. He deepens and resonates his voice when he wants to put the fear of the law into you. He calls it his “big pants voice.”

I’m thinking we playwrights–I’m a member of the Dramatists Guild–are a rather severe type of extroverted-introverts. Think of it, we are tucked away writing, and we emerge not to speak, but to make other people speak out loud in front of a big audience, preferably lots of big audiences! Perhaps we are extro-egoverted-introverts. I’m musing on this because I am have reopened my small black box, actually blue-box theater and in rehearsal with my new play, The Wish Maker. My cast has found all sorts of funny typos in it, and they have suggested some very good line changes. Proof-reading takes a cast. Proof-reading is so boring I need to play classical music to keep my mind on it. In my fantasy, Foreshadow, Book One of the Saga of Dragon-Born, which was about to be published by Booktrope, (Booktrope folded just before my book was ready to be published) I found two pages where practically every third word is capitalized. How did this glut of capitals happen? Do other extroverted-introvert authors have the bad habit of emulating Victorian novels by capitalizing all sorts of non-worthy-of-capitals-words? Well I should have some dinner before rehearsal. Maybe I’ll call for Chinese, or maybe not…

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The Brehon Laws and Hamlet

The Brehon Laws of Celtic Ireland are very ancient, in some ways part Proto-European, as Wikipedia reports, “A past may still be suggested for a certain legal concept based on Irish legal terms’ being cognate with terms in other Celtic languages.” Take a look at my article The Bardic Tradition’s Effect on Elizabethan Casting to see how the Brehon laws affected Shakespeare directly. The Celts of the British Isles had some pretty able and formidable queens. For those of us who’d like to see a woman play Hamlet, but not as a man, as woman, as Hamlette a future queen might be played, the Brehon laws and the history of queens of Celtic British Isles give us good example and fine rational.

Though Hamlet is set in Denmark, Shakespeare’s head remains firmly in the British Isles. If we look at Hamlet through the eyes of the Brehon laws, we find that if we cast Polonius as Polonia, Claudius’s sister, then by Brehon Law, Claudius’s sister’s children are his heirs. As the elder of the two sons (Laertes and Orpheus), Laertes becomes heir to the throne as Claudius’s heir. Also in Celtic history, the king is made king by virtue of being married to the queen. This is why Claudius married Gertrude. Killing his brother was not enough. To be king he had to be married to the queen. The land was tied to the queen. The king was its steward. This gives an explanation of why Hamlette is not automatically crowned monarch when her father dies. Claudius, does not have to kill Hamlette as a political threat. He can simply marry her off to Laertes, which is why Laertes (just before leaving to kick up his heels in la belle Paris) tells Orpheus that Hamlette is not really interested in him. Laertes knows that he is to marry Hamlette.

Things change though with the play within the play. At that point Claudius starts thinking of killing Hamlette. Why? Well, Claudius and Gertrude have now been married three months. Gertrude would now be showing if she were pregnant. Claudius now will have his own heir. Hamlette is a threat to his future child. Hamlette outsmarts Claudius and returns alive. Laertes returns full of vengeance for his mother and brother. Again the Brehon Laws give us insight. A woman could become queen if she had a champion to win a contest of arms for her, or if she could do so herself. The two possible heirs to the throne, Hamlette, as daughter to the murdered king, and Laertes, nephew and heir to the current king are to fence, to duel. Claudius sets up a contest of arms between Hamlette and Laertes. By Brehon Law, the winner of this bout would be the lawful heir.

So other than a few pronouns, I only have to fiddle a bit with Orpheus’s mad scene. The lines and story of Hamlet carry this interpretation of a Hamlette well.

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Guillermo Ramon Makes 1st Cut in MiSciFi

Storycrafter Studio’s actor and playwright, Guillermo Ramon, has made the first cut in the 2016 Miami International Science Fiction Festival. See him performed in “Music of Broken Water” as the Ghost of King Nisus.

“Dear Guillermo, Thank you for submitting your screenplay / work to the 2016 Miami International Science Fiction Film Festival—we greatly appreciate you sending us your work for consideration. You have made it to the selection round! You are part of the official selection, congratulations! Our Selection Committee is taking your work to a high level of scrutiny. Storytelling, character creation, and development are a highly subjective art and your work has found a place at MiSciFi. The selection process was extremely difficult and you have made it past the initial cut, congratulations! This will be announced, so you may publically announce this news. Next are selections for the “Runner upsâ€�. If you make the next round, the winners that make it past this next level of scrutiny will have one page selected by the author read during the MiSciFi awards in a live stage performance. This will be reserved for no fewer than five to no more than fifteen works. From that pool, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd winners will receive software licenses for Final Draft plus two pages selected by the author to be read in a stage performance with actors in costumes, and fantastic themed music. Yes, this will be recorded and placed on the MiSciFi Youtube channel for all to see. Reader comments below. We will send a follow-up email with laurels and additional details. Again, Congratulations! Troy Bernier- Program Director Edward Figueroa- Program Director Eric Swain- Program Director ========================== Great for a regular or animation. Adults to kids. Imaginative. Perfect layout/professional. Good pacing. Interesting goal-driven characters. Character voice not precise. Very visual and a good plot based around the end of slavery in the future.”

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Arthur Miller’s Definition of Plot as Conflict Is a Misnomer

The Dramatist, the magazine of the Dramatists’ Guild recently republished an excerpt of Arthur Miller’s essay “What is a Play.”  In the excerpt Miller says, “A play is conflict or it is nothing.” Then to better explain what he means by this he says, “I have an engineering analogy: If you build a bridge to go across a river it obviously has to go from one point to another point. …And I think you’ll find that plays that work, that people identify with, have a structure, maybe not an obvious one, but it’s there.” Miller is defining conflict in terms of engineering and structure. When you are talking engineering and structure you are talking vector theory.

Vector theory describes precisely forces and their behavior. Miller again explains what a play is by saying, “when you have one force and it’s in conflict with another force, it creates a third force which then finds itself in conflict with a fourth force. A play is the gradual evolution, dialectically, of a theme.” According to vector theory, converging forces create a new force just as Miller describes. Using the idea of forces to describe building a plot that is thematically sure, as Miller means, is to use vector theory to build your plot. Miller gives a great example with Hamlet, pointing out that Hamlet’s seeing of his father’s ghost sets the forces of the play in motion, and they are going to interact in a precise, essential way. Miller is absolutely right that the forces established in Hamlet must behave in a precise, essential way. What happens to forces when they converge is mathematically, elegantly precise.

While Miller splendidly describes a play as a structure shaped by theme, his nomenclature of “conflict” is off. Forces do not always conflict, but to form a structure they do always converge which means the forces are transformed in known ways when they come in contact with each other.

Let’s take Miller’s analogy of the bridge again. There are several different types of transformations happening in this image. In the literal, engineering sense, the materials used to build the bridge are transformed. They are structured to create a bridge and so are no longer planks, beams, and nails, or steel, cables, and bolts. They are now a bridge. There is no conflict between planks and beams or steel and cables; nevertheless the elements of the bridge have been transformed into something new, a usable, essential structure. The bridge is created without conflict (unless city permitting is involved) and the forces of the bridge’s creation allow for other forces, those who cross the bridge to move also without conflict. Further, the fellow who needed to cross the river now can. She is no longer stuck on one side, a positive resultant achieved by the joining of positive forces, all those forces involved with building the bridge. The river is no longer a divide; it is now something powerful and appealing visually and musically that is beneath our feet.

When forces converge they are transformed, for better or for worse, and it is that transformation which is the essence of a play. Ultimately, I think it is this transformation that makes for plays that profoundly move us. We leave the theater transformed by works like Miller’s The Crucible.

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Observations about the Publishing Industry Part 1

There is much speculation these days about whether the publishing industry will survive. Many seem to fear that since authors can self-publish, publishers will be done away with. Notables in the publishing world—editors, authors, publishers—maintain that the publishing industry will survive because they serve as the gate keepers, allowing talented and skilled writers into their company and keeping the untalented and unskilled out. They point out that bestselling Indie books are usually terrible and that the good Indie books (there must be some, right?) are too hard to find. These assertions are true, so what is the problem? Something must be going wrong since so many writers are turning to self-publishing and because books sales have been dropping for such a long time.

I think there is a blend of problems that has led to the shaky ground the book publishing industry is on. The publishing industry is doing nothing to nurture new writers. The publishing industry has allowed marketers to make the final decisions about book aquisitions. The publishing industry chooses to create “star” writers and pay them millions in advances and advertise the stars’ books heavily while “midlist” authors (all the other authors) are paid about $5k as an advance and scant marketing is given to their books. Further, marketing follows a simple to-do list, without revising their marketing strategies or creating new marketing strategies. Marketing does not work to predict reading trends, they simply react after the fact. For instance, in the US, the No Child Left Behind Act, enraged many teachers who resented having to abide by the laws’ requirement of regular testing of students to determine children were learning and how many children were learning. The rage in these teachers produced a generation who refuse to read. These students did learn to read, but would only read Manga. If you have several years where children are taught to resent reading, then you are going to have a significant drop in book buying when these children grow up which is precisely what happened. Manga sales went up, other books sales went way down. It has been a few years since the No Child Left Behind Act was passed, and by now either teachers have become used to the new procedures or new teachers have been hired to replace the old ones. Indeed, at least one principal fired all of his teachers because they did not bring up student scores. Now, unsurprisingly, Young Adult books are taking more and more shelves in bookstores. Teens are reading. Marketing should predict a future increase in all books because these reading teens will surely become reading adults. Way to go teachers!

So let’s look at the next issue. Why are writers self-publishing their books? I think we can safely assume that by and large they self publish because no publishers have accepted their books for publication. This will mean two things: one, that editors are turning down many bad books; and two, marketing, which has the final say in which books are acquired for publication, are turning down good books and choosing bad ones. Some of the bad books have some very good elements and good sections. These are writers with potential left to flounder on their own with their craft. They know they have talent, so they self-publish. Then there are the very good books that marketing nixes while at the same time accepting bad books that they know how to market according to their checklist—pigeon hole the genre, send out x many copies for reviews to these few reviewers, and send out fliers to these bookstore chains. The good books rejected by the publishing industry are then self-published by their authors because these authors want their books published. However, individual authors usually do not have the means to advertise their books sufficiently to be noticed and bring the appropriate revenue for their talent, skill, and work.

This boils down to three basic problems. There is not enough help for beginning writers; publishers need to improve their percentages of good books they choose over the bad ones they choose; and authors of quality Indie books do not have the means to make their books known. Clearly the best means of solving these three problems is through big publishers. Marketing having the final say of whether a book will be chosen for publication or not is a practice which has, I think, been directly responsible for much of the problems publishers face. Marketers are not trained in literature. Editors are. Publishers must return to the practice of head editors making the final decisions on what books are to be published. Next, the publishing practice of creating star authors who are paid one, two, even three million dollars in advances while those slated for “midlist” are paid about $5K for an advance and receive very little marketing of their books must be stopped. Marketing needs to start tracking literacy trends so that they can predict what markets will be broadening (and which shrinking) and hire more sales personal to make presentations about titles and establish more venues for sales. It used to be all sorts of shops would sell books, not just one big chain of bookstores and a few independent bookstores. Drugstores, dollar stores (once called dime stores), specialty shops all sold books. Every business school will tell you that a person who talks to you and puts a book in your hands will drive up more sales than just sending out a flier. A sales force works to bring in revenue.

In addition to making editors in charge of acquisitions and marketing strategizing for future sales and sales personal to sell the books, publishers need to invest in new writers. Publishers can nurture new authors and make money doing so. Since marketing will be predicting reading trends, not just trying to keep abreast of them, marketing will know what types of books will sell well. Publishers should open work-for-hire divisions focused on the genres that sell the best. For these work-for-hire divisions, authors would be contracted to write novels for a set number of years where they must meet deadlines, produce a set number of books, receive a livable salary, and do not receive royalties. The contract can include that another author in the bevy of work-for-hire writers can be assigned to any book to ensure its timely completion. Editors would oversee the writing of the novels; they would edit. At the end of the contracted time, the writer can be let go; the writer can be offered another contract; or the author can opt to turn to royalty paying contracts from whatever publisher wants to take the author on. This would be a very good deal for new authors and publishers because when an author in this work-for-hire bevy writes what proves to be a best seller, the publisher can pay everyone’s salary in the division and the author knows that in a few years either she’ll definitely be re-contracted for the bevy or can go for the royalty contracts.

Only the big publishers have the ability to acquire many titles, market many titles, set a big sales force in motion, and hire large numbers of the best editors. This is why publishing with big publishers will always be the best option for authors–if publishers will return decisions of acquisitions to those trained to make those decisions–editors, and if publishers establish a system for nurturing more new writers until those writers become steady producers of good writing. By hiring more great editors, acquiring more good books, hiring writers with talent, and requiring marketing to strategize and sell effectively, publishing will continue to be a valued and needed industry.

I would like to add that since corporations in the US are allowed to donate money to public schools, it would behoove the publishing giants to do so when cities and towns fall short of the funds they need to keep their excellent grade school reading teachers and middle and high school English teachers. If there are too few good teachers then there will be few book sales for years.

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